Embrace the struggle!

Whether it's dealing with a death in the family, a relationship that has ended, selling your house or any other number of different stressful situations, people turn to substances to help them through the pain. Instead of allowing the emotions to hit them full on, they take an alternative route. The problem is that the detour usually leads to more problems because when the pain returns, you realize that the issues haven't been dealt with.

We all have to find balance in our lives and that starts with doing some serious soul searching about who we are and what triggers our emotions. These are things that are not always pleasant to deal with because it reveals our vulnerability and many people see this as a sign of weakness.

I'm coming to grips with these issues myself and I realized why I am so afraid of being alone. The main reason is that I'm afraid that I won't be able to control my eating at times, especially at night when nobody is there. Many people with ED will hide and hoard their food and will purposely not eat in front of people because they are afraid that they will be judged. It's not something that you can explain to people who don't have ED but those who do have it know exactly what I'm talking about.

Now I'm confronted with my worst fear and that is really doing some soul searching on my own to see what makes me "tick!" I can only do this one day at a time and each successful day lays the building blocks for a great foundation.

I've decided to train for another Marathon in the fall. Although I have done many marathons and ultra-marathons (50 Mile and above), this will be my first attempt at running a fast marathon since 2007. The training and diet will be intense but I am looking forward to it.

Once I get the program I want, I will post it and continue to do regular updates so people can follow along if they so choose.